For those of you who have known me for life, this will be surprising. I'm not sure what happened in my life. I grew up believing in God and never doubted His existence, but I don't feel like I ever made the fully informed decision to follow Christ. I walked the walk and knew the talk. I was well behaved, but my heart was never in my faith and I never had the passion or love for God or others that I should have had. I had some traumatic experiences post-transplant, as mentioned in my story below, that brought me flat on my face. I had been struggling and came to the realization that I truly had never placed my life fully in His hands.
I don't know if I became a Christian at the age of four and just never developed a relationship with Jesus or if it was not until after my transplant after my traumatic summer. All I know is something happened to me in August 2006 that totally turned my life around and I haven't been the same since. I had times growing up where I felt like God was guiding me and in my life, but overall I kind of shut Him out and relied on myself. This has been a hard thing for me to share and be open about because it has been assumed my whole life that I was a Christian, even by myself. I didn't come to the realization that I might not be until I couldn't feel him with me during my time of greatest need. I wasn't able to connect with Him until I asked Him to come rescue me and forgive me for everything and committed everything to Him. Even though difficult to admit I may not have become a Christian until the age of 28 when always assumed otherwise, this has been an important step to me in sharing my story is so important to reach out to others. It was not a decision I made lightly on a whim. I had been thinking about it for years. I wanted to make sure that the decision to get baptized was mine, I understood the stand I was taking this time, and that no one had an influence on the decision- I needed to make it alone to know that I was following God's command to be baptized in obedience to Him. I am not ashamed of the gospel!
The fact is, it doesn't matter WHEN I became a follower of Christ. The important thing is I know NOW for certain and have no doubts. I've been confused about this for a long time...was I a believer who just fell backwards and got so far away from my Savior that I just never felt close to Him? Or did I never give Him my life in the first place? At the age of four, it's hard to tell if you've truly had a life change. But, my passion is strong and it drives me in everything I do. I am not the same person I was before. God is amazing and there is no doubt He exists and is very, very real and loves me and you so much!
The following story was read as I pinned my message to Jesus on the cross, walked across stage with my dad who has played a large role in my spiritual growth/salvation regardless when it was, and then stood in the nice warm pool. I shivered all the way to the bathroom to change clothes. I did NOT want to get out! Lucky Mike who got to stay in there for most of the service!
Ironically, two of my close friends also decided, independently, to get baptized on the same day. Then we found out we had even picked the same service! It was cool to share the day with others who have also had a spiritual influence on me and we are doing life together.
For those of you who may not know, Baptism is a public way of telling everyone that I am a follower of Christ and have fully dedicated my life to serving Him in whatever capacity He has for me.
The story as read during baptism:
I’m the Founder and President of the Gastroparesis Patient Association for Cures and Treatments. G-PACT is a non-profit increasing awareness of gastroparesis and chronic intestinal pseudo-obstruction. I have struggled with these conditions for 16 years. I also volunteer with the kidcrew in The Wheelhouse and do office work for LCBC. I’m involved in a singles Life Group, am a rabid Steelers fan, and edit books my dad develops on leading others to Christ.
When I was four I prayed to trust Jesus. I was baptized, but I didn’t understand the significance. I never felt much love for others and was selfish. I didn’t rely on God to get me through tough physical challenges. I never truly felt His presence in my life.
On March 13, 2006 I received the gift of life when I survived a five organ transplant at the University of Pittsburgh. I encountered problems after the transplant which left me in desperation. No one understood what I was dealing with and I felt completely alone. My dad realized I was struggling and he took me through the first discipleship book in the series I now edit. In August of 2006, I recognized the sacrifice Jesus had made for me. Then I made the informed decision to be a fully devoted follower of Christ.
When I trusted Jesus, there was instant peace. He calmed my fears. I felt like my prayers actually went somewhere. I knew then that, no matter what, I was going to be ok whether on earth or in heaven.
Now I am passionate about connecting others to Jesus through G-PACT, LCBC, life example, and sharing my story. I don’t fear death and recognize the importance of living every day to the fullest. My life has been spared for a purpose. God has been doing incredible things and he has a very important plan for me.
I want to be baptized today because I want to express my commitment of two new lives to Christ. Last week I celebrated the four year anniversary of my new physical life as a recipient of a new digestive tract! Without that new physical life, I would not be celebrating my new spiritual life as a fully-devoted follower of Christ today.
Baptized March 23, 2010 at LCBC Harrisburg on Chambers Hill Road
Pastor: Mike Albon
Showing posts with label gastric motility disorders. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gastric motility disorders. Show all posts
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Just Imagine...
Can you imagine never being able to eat again? Hooking up to IV nutrition or tube feedings every day in order to live? Carrying your nutrition on your back all day or being attached to a pole all night? Or, simply having to "survive" on chicken broth, Ensure, and small bites of food all day long? And in spite of that, still dealing with malnutrition, dehydration, weight loss, abdominal pain, nausea, and vomiting on a daily basis?
Frequent trips to the ER and hospital become routine...just a part of life. Social activities are non-existent because most of them involve food. If you do go out, you end up ordering water, maybe a soda, and pulling that pack of crackers out of your purse to nibble at. You feel fortunate that you are even capable of keeping that down, realizing that many people in similar situations can't. Making plans is a challenge. You may feel well and up for an outing, but then while out the symptoms attack and a planned fun-filled evening becomes a drag very quickly. That's what life with gastroparesis and intestinal pseudo-obstruction is like.
These conditions are so poorly understood. They are so hidden that people often don't believe they are real or are not as serious as they actually are. Although difficult to understand, patients suffering from GP and CIP may look completely healthy. They may drive, work, shop, go to church, take care of a family, and look great on the outside. Their color may be nice, they may look strong and energetic, and they may appear to be feeling well. Yet, the turmoil churning within them is by no means normal.
Remember the last time you had the flu. After 24 hours of nausea, vomiting, perhaps diarrhea, and aches and pains, you couldn't wait to get back to work and your normal activities. As you tried to return to your routine activities, however, you did notice you felt weaker than usual. It was more challenging to get things done because you had a day of surviving on toast, crackers, and soup...not exactly a champions dinner!
Now, take that day and multiply it by years. Add medication, medical procedures, hospitalizations, chronic malnutrition complications, invasive treatments, surgeries, and additional illnesses that develop over time. You are getting closer to understanding what life with GP and CIP is like, but you are still not there.
On top of the physical issues, because the conditions are so poorly understood, people with GP and CIP often have to live with the challenges of stereotyping by society. It is often believed that patients are exaggerating their conditions because they don't "look sick." Others believe those who suffer really just have an eating disorder and use a "mild" condition as an excuse for not eating well. People simply don't understand that a couple sips of soup can send one's gut into a frenzy and result in hours of nausea, abdominal pain, and vomiting. Sometimes this lasts even for days. One wrong bite of food can result in a bowel obstruction and trip to the hospital for an NG tube for suction or surgery to remove the blockage. There are no cold and flu treatments to help symptoms or treat the conditions at all. At best, patients can try some anti-nausea medications with nasty side effects, or drugs that are so expensive insurance companies only provide 12 a month...so they have to decide which 12 times a month they are sick enough to take it. On top of that, any drugs that may help are pulled from the market and no longer available. Once that is removed, even if restarted through compassionate clearance programs, they never quite work as well again. But the odds of getting on that program are slim to none. They feel like everything has been taken away from them...not only health, a normal life, food, and even friends and family who jump ship, but the only treatment that keeps them even somewhat functioning.
Think back again to the day you had the flu. You probably did not want to lift your head off the bed or couch. You felt too weak to make it to the bathroom. Every time you sat up, you felt your head spin and the nausea increased even more. Finally, it was a battle of determination to force yourself up and walk to distance to the bathroom. While you were up, you tried to grab as many items as you needed so you didn't have to get back up again for a long time. By the time you get back to bed, you were so weak and wiped out that all you wanted to do is sleep or watch TV. But you couldn't get your mind off the nausea. It was so overwhelming that you curled up into a ball on your side and just waited for it to pass. You took flu medication in hopes of sleeping it off and had hope that tomorrow would be better.
People with GP and CIP don't have that hope that tomorrow will be better right now. Each day varies and some are better than others, but inevitably the bad days will always come back. There are limited options to treat symptoms, but they don't work well. Patients are basically told to "live with it." In some cases, it can't be lived with. While most people with GP get by on what is available, because there are no other options, quality of life is certainly very poor. Many survive on less than 1,000 calories a day, severe weight loss, disability, tube feedings, IV nutrition, medication with nasty side effects, and a life full of invasive medical treatments and hospitalizations. GP and CIP are not just simple illnesses which can be cured through diet changes, medication, or surgery. They do not mildly impact life. They have a profound influence on every daily activities, regardless of severity. There is no escape. Is this the kind of life a person wants to "just live with?"
There are also many situations in which living with GP and CIP are no longer an option. In severe cases, chronic malnutrition takes over and people are unable to survive the trauma on the body. The body often quits absorbing, organs shut down, and the liver may fail for those who have been on long term IV nutrition. Veins become inaccessible and there is no way for them to receive nutrition. Some who are fortunate enough to be aware of the option and be eligible may pursue a five organ transplant as a last resort to stay alive. While this can be miraculous and life saving, it doesn't come without its own complications for life. Individuals who reach this level of severity have become desperate. There are no options. They either risk their lives by going through a transplant, recognizing that even if they make it to the transplant and out of the OR, they face a lifetime of complications and possible organ rejection. But the only other option is starvation. There's not really a choice when you get to that point.
Living with GP and CIP is hard to describe. The best patients can do to help others understand is to tell people to consider what it would feel like to have the flu, every single day, and the impact that would have on your life. But then you have to throw in additional health problems and the stereotypes, comments, and claims by others that what they deal with is not real and not worthy of attention. Because they don't "look" sick, family and friends who don't believe put a wedge between them or completely leave, believing that the person is trying to use a mild condition to "benefit" from resources such as disability, have an excuse to get out of unwanted duties, a way to receive special parking "privileges," and other accommodations at work and school. They are often looked at oddly when forced to admit they are on disability because of a "stomach" problem, can't lift a box of sodas into their cars because they are too weak, get glared at because they park in an HP spot but get out of the car walking, and dealing with other colleagues and students who are jealous of the accommodations received to make life easier to live and adaptation into society easier.
GP and CIP need more attention. People don't understand what it is really like to fight these conditions and what daily life is like for those who suffer. They are downplayed as simply being conditions that can be controlled if "you would just eat correctly and avoid certain foods." While in some instances this is true, there is a very wide spectrum to the level that people die from these conditions as well. If not to the point of dying physically, many are unable to truly "live" at all as GP and CIP zaps the life out of them. Note how long it took you to recover from just a 24 hour flu. Then realize that in GP and CIP there is no recovery. There is no in between. It is a daily battle, with ups and downs, unknowns, and a life full of complexity and misunderstanding. Try to step into their shoes for a short time. Next time you have your head in the toilet, imagine life like that every day. Be thankful for what you have. Be thankful you will recover and life will return to normal. And remember those whose lives will never return to normal. Give back. Help them fight. Support them. Try to understand. Let them vent without judging them. Encourage them. They often lack self-confidence because they have either been judged so much or feel as if they are incapable of accomplishing important things because of being ill. Also, realize that you are dealing with some of the strongest, toughest, people you will ever meet. Thank you for taking the time to read this and step into the lives of those suffering from GP and CIP for a short time.
Frequent trips to the ER and hospital become routine...just a part of life. Social activities are non-existent because most of them involve food. If you do go out, you end up ordering water, maybe a soda, and pulling that pack of crackers out of your purse to nibble at. You feel fortunate that you are even capable of keeping that down, realizing that many people in similar situations can't. Making plans is a challenge. You may feel well and up for an outing, but then while out the symptoms attack and a planned fun-filled evening becomes a drag very quickly. That's what life with gastroparesis and intestinal pseudo-obstruction is like.
These conditions are so poorly understood. They are so hidden that people often don't believe they are real or are not as serious as they actually are. Although difficult to understand, patients suffering from GP and CIP may look completely healthy. They may drive, work, shop, go to church, take care of a family, and look great on the outside. Their color may be nice, they may look strong and energetic, and they may appear to be feeling well. Yet, the turmoil churning within them is by no means normal.
Remember the last time you had the flu. After 24 hours of nausea, vomiting, perhaps diarrhea, and aches and pains, you couldn't wait to get back to work and your normal activities. As you tried to return to your routine activities, however, you did notice you felt weaker than usual. It was more challenging to get things done because you had a day of surviving on toast, crackers, and soup...not exactly a champions dinner!
Now, take that day and multiply it by years. Add medication, medical procedures, hospitalizations, chronic malnutrition complications, invasive treatments, surgeries, and additional illnesses that develop over time. You are getting closer to understanding what life with GP and CIP is like, but you are still not there.
On top of the physical issues, because the conditions are so poorly understood, people with GP and CIP often have to live with the challenges of stereotyping by society. It is often believed that patients are exaggerating their conditions because they don't "look sick." Others believe those who suffer really just have an eating disorder and use a "mild" condition as an excuse for not eating well. People simply don't understand that a couple sips of soup can send one's gut into a frenzy and result in hours of nausea, abdominal pain, and vomiting. Sometimes this lasts even for days. One wrong bite of food can result in a bowel obstruction and trip to the hospital for an NG tube for suction or surgery to remove the blockage. There are no cold and flu treatments to help symptoms or treat the conditions at all. At best, patients can try some anti-nausea medications with nasty side effects, or drugs that are so expensive insurance companies only provide 12 a month...so they have to decide which 12 times a month they are sick enough to take it. On top of that, any drugs that may help are pulled from the market and no longer available. Once that is removed, even if restarted through compassionate clearance programs, they never quite work as well again. But the odds of getting on that program are slim to none. They feel like everything has been taken away from them...not only health, a normal life, food, and even friends and family who jump ship, but the only treatment that keeps them even somewhat functioning.
Think back again to the day you had the flu. You probably did not want to lift your head off the bed or couch. You felt too weak to make it to the bathroom. Every time you sat up, you felt your head spin and the nausea increased even more. Finally, it was a battle of determination to force yourself up and walk to distance to the bathroom. While you were up, you tried to grab as many items as you needed so you didn't have to get back up again for a long time. By the time you get back to bed, you were so weak and wiped out that all you wanted to do is sleep or watch TV. But you couldn't get your mind off the nausea. It was so overwhelming that you curled up into a ball on your side and just waited for it to pass. You took flu medication in hopes of sleeping it off and had hope that tomorrow would be better.
People with GP and CIP don't have that hope that tomorrow will be better right now. Each day varies and some are better than others, but inevitably the bad days will always come back. There are limited options to treat symptoms, but they don't work well. Patients are basically told to "live with it." In some cases, it can't be lived with. While most people with GP get by on what is available, because there are no other options, quality of life is certainly very poor. Many survive on less than 1,000 calories a day, severe weight loss, disability, tube feedings, IV nutrition, medication with nasty side effects, and a life full of invasive medical treatments and hospitalizations. GP and CIP are not just simple illnesses which can be cured through diet changes, medication, or surgery. They do not mildly impact life. They have a profound influence on every daily activities, regardless of severity. There is no escape. Is this the kind of life a person wants to "just live with?"
There are also many situations in which living with GP and CIP are no longer an option. In severe cases, chronic malnutrition takes over and people are unable to survive the trauma on the body. The body often quits absorbing, organs shut down, and the liver may fail for those who have been on long term IV nutrition. Veins become inaccessible and there is no way for them to receive nutrition. Some who are fortunate enough to be aware of the option and be eligible may pursue a five organ transplant as a last resort to stay alive. While this can be miraculous and life saving, it doesn't come without its own complications for life. Individuals who reach this level of severity have become desperate. There are no options. They either risk their lives by going through a transplant, recognizing that even if they make it to the transplant and out of the OR, they face a lifetime of complications and possible organ rejection. But the only other option is starvation. There's not really a choice when you get to that point.
Living with GP and CIP is hard to describe. The best patients can do to help others understand is to tell people to consider what it would feel like to have the flu, every single day, and the impact that would have on your life. But then you have to throw in additional health problems and the stereotypes, comments, and claims by others that what they deal with is not real and not worthy of attention. Because they don't "look" sick, family and friends who don't believe put a wedge between them or completely leave, believing that the person is trying to use a mild condition to "benefit" from resources such as disability, have an excuse to get out of unwanted duties, a way to receive special parking "privileges," and other accommodations at work and school. They are often looked at oddly when forced to admit they are on disability because of a "stomach" problem, can't lift a box of sodas into their cars because they are too weak, get glared at because they park in an HP spot but get out of the car walking, and dealing with other colleagues and students who are jealous of the accommodations received to make life easier to live and adaptation into society easier.
GP and CIP need more attention. People don't understand what it is really like to fight these conditions and what daily life is like for those who suffer. They are downplayed as simply being conditions that can be controlled if "you would just eat correctly and avoid certain foods." While in some instances this is true, there is a very wide spectrum to the level that people die from these conditions as well. If not to the point of dying physically, many are unable to truly "live" at all as GP and CIP zaps the life out of them. Note how long it took you to recover from just a 24 hour flu. Then realize that in GP and CIP there is no recovery. There is no in between. It is a daily battle, with ups and downs, unknowns, and a life full of complexity and misunderstanding. Try to step into their shoes for a short time. Next time you have your head in the toilet, imagine life like that every day. Be thankful for what you have. Be thankful you will recover and life will return to normal. And remember those whose lives will never return to normal. Give back. Help them fight. Support them. Try to understand. Let them vent without judging them. Encourage them. They often lack self-confidence because they have either been judged so much or feel as if they are incapable of accomplishing important things because of being ill. Also, realize that you are dealing with some of the strongest, toughest, people you will ever meet. Thank you for taking the time to read this and step into the lives of those suffering from GP and CIP for a short time.
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