You don't appreciate life as much until you've almost lost it. Once you are given a second chance, you really realize the meaning of it and how fragile it can be. So few people have the opportunity to re-evaluate life and the meaning of it.
My life isn't like "It's a Wonderful Life" in that I was never born, but I see it as if I have had the same opportunity to see what changes I can make to make the world a different place. I have learned this at a very early age. I appreciate life so much more! I get excited about the teeniest things that most people see as mundane and routine.
If something goes wrong, I'm normal and I DO complain, but I quickly try to straighten out. Problems are problems and they are tough. Life is tough. It is what it is. Some of us have been forced to tackle incredible challenges, while others have experienced a relatively normal life with relatively normal problems. But, we all have our struggles and I don't believe that anyone's problems are minor. They are all a big deal and have a profound influence on us. We grow through them, regardless of what they are. I want to hear about the struggles of everyone, regardless of how "minor" they may seem in comparison. I care about your concerns. They matter to me too! God must have really big, active, and perfect ears because He hears from me all the time!
People often ask me how I do it. How do I deal with so much? I don't really have any choice! No, it's not easy. No I am not always as strong as I appear to be or as I say. I'm just glad I'm still here to experience the problems and work my way through them. I am a stronger person for it. I get stronger all the time.
Going through a transplant is TOUGH. The process, the fears, the unknowns, the loss of others not so fortunate, the complications that arise, the complications expected to arise from long term-medications, and feeling lost in a world where people haven't had the same experiences. Trying to balance out my health life with any sense of "normalcy" like a job, having a family, living on my own, and having energy to spend time with friends and just hang out is challenging. I want to be "normal" in terms of life activities, but my body too often has its own plans. Some days I am too weak to get out of bed, while others I am energetic and ready to conquer the world. I never know what each day will be like. None of us do, but it's much more real and unstable for me.
I can be happy, jumpy, and feel well for half a day and be in the ER or hospital later that same day. I can look really good for a while, and then I crash out and can't move. I can be out driving, and then have to stop to avoid falling asleep at the wheel. I can feel well, then eat a piece of cheese or a few crackers and be sick the rest of the day. But, I am a fighter. I know I am strong.
I don't always feel strong though. Sometimes I just want to cry and cry and cry. I want to scream, throw pillows around, and shut out the world. Sometimes it doesn't seem fair. But life isn't fair. I don't know why I have been through all of this. All I know is that I can't imagine what my life would be like if I hadn't. What would I be doing? Would I be better off or worse off? Would I be as strong? Would God and relying on Him be as high of a priority in my life? I can't imagine my life any differently. I don't know it differently. Not that I wouldn't love to be functioning as my healthy friends and loved ones, but I'm not sure I really "miss" it because I don't really know what I'm missing out on. Maybe a day in the life of YOUR shoes would help me understand. But, I'm not sure I could handle the pain of experiencing a day in the life of an average person and really realizing what I have lost. Or perhaps, the pain wouldn't be as strong because I will realize what I have gained too. The things that you are missing out on because you haven't shared the good side of my experiences.
To the outside world this is horrendous. Yes, there are times that are horrendous and I want to give up, but I honestly don't know life any other way and perhaps that's one way I can cope. I've learned to adapt, change, and work through each new complication as it arises. I've had to become flexible. The fact is, God always comes through for me and gives me what I need to deal with each situation that arises. He will never allow me more than I can bear. When I feel like it is too much, He will always be there to supply all my needs. The feelings of His provisions when I am absolutely desperate and at His feet is something that can't be matched. Oh how He loves me so! He has been there for me in amazing ways over the past few weeks. I have felt His presence in the midst of some pretty tough challenges and He has brought me through in His own unique and loving ways.
What has this given me? I have to focus on that rather than what it has taken away. While it has robbed me of so much, it has given me so much more I believe that only a few people who deal with the same situations can obtain. Compassion unmatched by anyone who is not in my shoes. The opportunity to help others in ways I never would have had. I've met some incredible people who I can't imagine not being part of my life. I have matured and grown in ways that many people never do. I have an understanding and appreciation for the finer things that people don't notice. I love Mondays! Monday is another day of the week to cherish and live out the second life I have been given. It's not a day to dread!
I LOVE life. I say this all the time, but I LOVE LIFE! Even with its challenges, its ups and downs, discouragements, fears, overwhelming sadness, devastation, there is so much GOOD! Just look around you! There is so much to enjoy in life! So much to learn, so many people to meet, so many things to experience!
I LOVE people. I love helping people. I love being around people! All kinds of people! I used to not be as accepting of such a wide range of backgrounds, but now I LOVE everybody! I realize that everyone has a purpose in life. Some make bad decisions, some try to hurt me intentionally, some don't understand me, but it's ok. God loves everyone...EVERYONE. I strive to do the same.
It's so easy to feel useless in this world when you can't keep up with others or give back as much due to limitations. Your life matters. Whether you are homebound, unable to work, unable to give much back to society, whether you are brilliant or mentally challenged, a president or a pooper scooper, what you do is important. Somehow, somewhere, your life has had an impact on someone. That someone's world has been changed because of you. If that's all that you ever feel like you have accomplished in life, you have changed the world!
In a recent Carissaism I stated "Some people write and others speak. Some build and others destroy. Some see the glass as half-full, others half-empty. Many lead, others follow. Some are outgoing, others shy. Some are anxious, others calm. Some work ahead, others procrastinate. Some enjoy a busy schedule, others like to be free. We all have our differences. We don't always agree. But when we all come together, what an impact we can be!"
Make a difference in your world today! Even the simplest things matter!
Showing posts with label intestinal transplant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label intestinal transplant. Show all posts
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Following Christ- my story of "knowing" but not really "knowing"
For those of you who have known me for life, this will be surprising. I'm not sure what happened in my life. I grew up believing in God and never doubted His existence, but I don't feel like I ever made the fully informed decision to follow Christ. I walked the walk and knew the talk. I was well behaved, but my heart was never in my faith and I never had the passion or love for God or others that I should have had. I had some traumatic experiences post-transplant, as mentioned in my story below, that brought me flat on my face. I had been struggling and came to the realization that I truly had never placed my life fully in His hands.
I don't know if I became a Christian at the age of four and just never developed a relationship with Jesus or if it was not until after my transplant after my traumatic summer. All I know is something happened to me in August 2006 that totally turned my life around and I haven't been the same since. I had times growing up where I felt like God was guiding me and in my life, but overall I kind of shut Him out and relied on myself. This has been a hard thing for me to share and be open about because it has been assumed my whole life that I was a Christian, even by myself. I didn't come to the realization that I might not be until I couldn't feel him with me during my time of greatest need. I wasn't able to connect with Him until I asked Him to come rescue me and forgive me for everything and committed everything to Him. Even though difficult to admit I may not have become a Christian until the age of 28 when always assumed otherwise, this has been an important step to me in sharing my story is so important to reach out to others. It was not a decision I made lightly on a whim. I had been thinking about it for years. I wanted to make sure that the decision to get baptized was mine, I understood the stand I was taking this time, and that no one had an influence on the decision- I needed to make it alone to know that I was following God's command to be baptized in obedience to Him. I am not ashamed of the gospel!
The fact is, it doesn't matter WHEN I became a follower of Christ. The important thing is I know NOW for certain and have no doubts. I've been confused about this for a long time...was I a believer who just fell backwards and got so far away from my Savior that I just never felt close to Him? Or did I never give Him my life in the first place? At the age of four, it's hard to tell if you've truly had a life change. But, my passion is strong and it drives me in everything I do. I am not the same person I was before. God is amazing and there is no doubt He exists and is very, very real and loves me and you so much!
The following story was read as I pinned my message to Jesus on the cross, walked across stage with my dad who has played a large role in my spiritual growth/salvation regardless when it was, and then stood in the nice warm pool. I shivered all the way to the bathroom to change clothes. I did NOT want to get out! Lucky Mike who got to stay in there for most of the service!
Ironically, two of my close friends also decided, independently, to get baptized on the same day. Then we found out we had even picked the same service! It was cool to share the day with others who have also had a spiritual influence on me and we are doing life together.
For those of you who may not know, Baptism is a public way of telling everyone that I am a follower of Christ and have fully dedicated my life to serving Him in whatever capacity He has for me.
The story as read during baptism:
I’m the Founder and President of the Gastroparesis Patient Association for Cures and Treatments. G-PACT is a non-profit increasing awareness of gastroparesis and chronic intestinal pseudo-obstruction. I have struggled with these conditions for 16 years. I also volunteer with the kidcrew in The Wheelhouse and do office work for LCBC. I’m involved in a singles Life Group, am a rabid Steelers fan, and edit books my dad develops on leading others to Christ.
When I was four I prayed to trust Jesus. I was baptized, but I didn’t understand the significance. I never felt much love for others and was selfish. I didn’t rely on God to get me through tough physical challenges. I never truly felt His presence in my life.
On March 13, 2006 I received the gift of life when I survived a five organ transplant at the University of Pittsburgh. I encountered problems after the transplant which left me in desperation. No one understood what I was dealing with and I felt completely alone. My dad realized I was struggling and he took me through the first discipleship book in the series I now edit. In August of 2006, I recognized the sacrifice Jesus had made for me. Then I made the informed decision to be a fully devoted follower of Christ.
When I trusted Jesus, there was instant peace. He calmed my fears. I felt like my prayers actually went somewhere. I knew then that, no matter what, I was going to be ok whether on earth or in heaven.
Now I am passionate about connecting others to Jesus through G-PACT, LCBC, life example, and sharing my story. I don’t fear death and recognize the importance of living every day to the fullest. My life has been spared for a purpose. God has been doing incredible things and he has a very important plan for me.
I want to be baptized today because I want to express my commitment of two new lives to Christ. Last week I celebrated the four year anniversary of my new physical life as a recipient of a new digestive tract! Without that new physical life, I would not be celebrating my new spiritual life as a fully-devoted follower of Christ today.
Baptized March 23, 2010 at LCBC Harrisburg on Chambers Hill Road
Pastor: Mike Albon
I don't know if I became a Christian at the age of four and just never developed a relationship with Jesus or if it was not until after my transplant after my traumatic summer. All I know is something happened to me in August 2006 that totally turned my life around and I haven't been the same since. I had times growing up where I felt like God was guiding me and in my life, but overall I kind of shut Him out and relied on myself. This has been a hard thing for me to share and be open about because it has been assumed my whole life that I was a Christian, even by myself. I didn't come to the realization that I might not be until I couldn't feel him with me during my time of greatest need. I wasn't able to connect with Him until I asked Him to come rescue me and forgive me for everything and committed everything to Him. Even though difficult to admit I may not have become a Christian until the age of 28 when always assumed otherwise, this has been an important step to me in sharing my story is so important to reach out to others. It was not a decision I made lightly on a whim. I had been thinking about it for years. I wanted to make sure that the decision to get baptized was mine, I understood the stand I was taking this time, and that no one had an influence on the decision- I needed to make it alone to know that I was following God's command to be baptized in obedience to Him. I am not ashamed of the gospel!
The fact is, it doesn't matter WHEN I became a follower of Christ. The important thing is I know NOW for certain and have no doubts. I've been confused about this for a long time...was I a believer who just fell backwards and got so far away from my Savior that I just never felt close to Him? Or did I never give Him my life in the first place? At the age of four, it's hard to tell if you've truly had a life change. But, my passion is strong and it drives me in everything I do. I am not the same person I was before. God is amazing and there is no doubt He exists and is very, very real and loves me and you so much!
The following story was read as I pinned my message to Jesus on the cross, walked across stage with my dad who has played a large role in my spiritual growth/salvation regardless when it was, and then stood in the nice warm pool. I shivered all the way to the bathroom to change clothes. I did NOT want to get out! Lucky Mike who got to stay in there for most of the service!
Ironically, two of my close friends also decided, independently, to get baptized on the same day. Then we found out we had even picked the same service! It was cool to share the day with others who have also had a spiritual influence on me and we are doing life together.
For those of you who may not know, Baptism is a public way of telling everyone that I am a follower of Christ and have fully dedicated my life to serving Him in whatever capacity He has for me.
The story as read during baptism:
I’m the Founder and President of the Gastroparesis Patient Association for Cures and Treatments. G-PACT is a non-profit increasing awareness of gastroparesis and chronic intestinal pseudo-obstruction. I have struggled with these conditions for 16 years. I also volunteer with the kidcrew in The Wheelhouse and do office work for LCBC. I’m involved in a singles Life Group, am a rabid Steelers fan, and edit books my dad develops on leading others to Christ.
When I was four I prayed to trust Jesus. I was baptized, but I didn’t understand the significance. I never felt much love for others and was selfish. I didn’t rely on God to get me through tough physical challenges. I never truly felt His presence in my life.
On March 13, 2006 I received the gift of life when I survived a five organ transplant at the University of Pittsburgh. I encountered problems after the transplant which left me in desperation. No one understood what I was dealing with and I felt completely alone. My dad realized I was struggling and he took me through the first discipleship book in the series I now edit. In August of 2006, I recognized the sacrifice Jesus had made for me. Then I made the informed decision to be a fully devoted follower of Christ.
When I trusted Jesus, there was instant peace. He calmed my fears. I felt like my prayers actually went somewhere. I knew then that, no matter what, I was going to be ok whether on earth or in heaven.
Now I am passionate about connecting others to Jesus through G-PACT, LCBC, life example, and sharing my story. I don’t fear death and recognize the importance of living every day to the fullest. My life has been spared for a purpose. God has been doing incredible things and he has a very important plan for me.
I want to be baptized today because I want to express my commitment of two new lives to Christ. Last week I celebrated the four year anniversary of my new physical life as a recipient of a new digestive tract! Without that new physical life, I would not be celebrating my new spiritual life as a fully-devoted follower of Christ today.
Baptized March 23, 2010 at LCBC Harrisburg on Chambers Hill Road
Pastor: Mike Albon
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