Saturday, December 10, 2011

The strength in the scars

I look at my abdomen, my neck, arms and chest. They are battered and bruised, sliced, off colored, and malformed. I have one vertical scar that goes from my pelvic area all the way up to my chest with scars beside it from over 70 staples. That scar is crossed with a long horizontal scar that goes across my entire abdomen from side to side. Next to it there is scar tissue from over 70 staples which were placed to hold 5 new organs in place. Both of those scars are at least a foot long. I have scars on my chest from years of IV lines. I have a hole in my abdomen from which a tube emerges. There is a large cut on my chest with a bulging area where a port is located under my skin, and it is not a pretty sight. Both the tube and the port are my lifelines right now.

My abdomen is not pretty. My neck is covered with scars and indicate the challenges of years of chronic illness. My arms and hands are purple and off-color. I have areas in my abdomen where I appear to have several belly buttons from old j-tube and g-tube sites. My scars are not beautiful to see. They are ugly. But I love them. They are a constant reminder of the battle I fight and how much I can overcome. They show me every single day that I am STRONG and can overcome pain and suffering and still move on with life. I don't hide behind my scars. I will show them off proudly if you ask because they show my strength and remind me that I can overcome anything. They are an indication of the pain that I have endured. They prove that I will do whatever it takes to keep fighting. The pain I deal with in life is worth the opportunity to keep living. Pain brings strength and leads to healing. So often pain must occur before healing can begin.

“Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue. Realize the strength, move on.”
Henry Rollins

"Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars" - Kahlil Gibran

"It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars." - Garrison Keillor

"Every winner has scars." - Robert N. C. Nix

"Turn your scars into stars." - Robert H. Schuller

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